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Please understand that this is general information related to denial of visitation The information is not meant to be legal advice and is not based upon a thorough assessment of your situation or needs. Further, please understand that you should discuss these options and strategies with an attorney before taking action on your own and nothing on this page should be construed as legal advice.

WHAT IS NEEDED FOR VISITATION ENFORCEMENT?

1. A valid court order is an order that has been issued commanding or prohibiting the subject in question from doing a particular act. A valid court order must be signed by a judge or issued by the district clerk's office, certified as having been signed by a judge.

2. The subject in question was validly served with such court order or it can be shown that the subject had prior knowledge of the court order and its content.

3. The subject in question having full knowledge of the above two factors is intentionally and willfully violating the court order.

This sample document is used to notify the non-custodial parent of intent of visitation and printed with permission from DADS Against Discrimination and is intended to help document attempts made while exercising court ordered visitation.

IN THE DISTRICT COURT OF (YOUR) COUNTY, (STATE)

(PETITIONER) vs. (RESPONDENT) (YOUR DIVORCE CASE #)

NOTICE OF INTENT TO EXERCISE PARENTAL RIGHT

YOU ARE ADVISED that (YOUR NAME HERE) intends to Exercise his parental rights with his child(ren) (CHILDS FULL NAME 1) and (CHILDS FULL NAME 2) in the following matter.

1. The children shall spend from (DAY) evening at (TIME)p.m. to (TIME) p.m. (DAY) evening on (PICK UP DATES EXAMPLE: July 22nd and 23rd).

2. Place of pick-up and return shall be (ADDRESS, CITY, STATE).

3. The children will need the appropriate changes of clothing and health care items for a overnight visitation.

4. During the exercise of the above time schedule, the children shall be located within the bounds of the (YOUR COUNTY) area.

5. Basis for the exercise of parental rights: Order granted by Judge (JUDGES NAME) on (DATE OF VISITATION ORDER, YEAR).

AS NOTICE HEREOF, The original of this Notice Of Intent To Exercise Parental Rights has been filed with the Court, and true copies have been mailed as indicated below. YOU ARE REQUESTED TO COOPERATE in permitting the Respondent to exercise his lawful parental rights and to notify the Respondent's attorney's listed below and the Court in writing prior to the date of exercise if there is some legal reason why these rights, as set forth, cannot be exercised at the date, time, place, and in the particulars described.

_______________________(SIGN HERE)

(YOUR NAME)

(YOUR ADDRESS)

(CITY, STATE, ZIP) (PHONE)

(MAIL DUPLICATES TO ALL PARTIES)

Original copy filed with

Clerk of Court and copy mailed this date _____________________ to:

(YOUR EX)

(HER ADDRESS)

(CITY, STATE, ZIP)

(Attorneys Name here if applicable)

PROVING A DENIAL OF VISITATION

1. Take a witness along with you - preferably an off-duty constable or deputy or other neutral official. Have our witness stay in your vehicle, but with the window down so that he/she can hear the tone of the conversation and with the vehicle parked in such a way as the witness can easily see you all the time.

2. Take a Xerox copy of our divorce decree along with you which shows that you are supposed to see the child(ren) on that weekend and at that time. DO NOT BE EVEN 5 MINUTES LATE.

3. Take a tape recorder with you - have it running from the time you approach the residence, and do not stop it until you leave. Do NOT have it on the ''voice activated'' setting as you need to show the time elapsed during your stay there. Keep it running as you leave the area.

4. As you approach the residence state the following facts into the recorder:

Your complete name

The address you are approaching

The reason you are there ''I am going to pick up my child(ren) as this is my weekend to visit them.''

State who is with you and why.

State the time of the day and a.m. or p.m.

5. As you leave, state that you are leaving and state the time and briefly what occurred which did not appear on the recorder. (She/He made an obscene gesture, etc.)

6. Keep a calendar of each denied visitation, and keep a written record of the number of recordings you have.

7. Make sure you have a credible witness each time that you try to go see the child(ren) and DO NOT MISS A VISITATION PERIOD.

8. If she/he calls the police, keep the recorder running as long as they will let you, but DO NOT shut it off until they arrive.

9. Remember to use a new tape for each attempted visit, and make sure it is blank, except for your attempted visits as admitting a tape in evidence admits the whole tape and everything on it.

10. When recruiting a person to go with you, always have a back-up just in case your first choice cannot make it, but DO NOT GO ALONE. Start out early to give yourself plenty of time. You can always stop at a store near her/his house and get a soft drink to kill time. Do NOT drink beer or other alcoholic beverages before going there.

11. If your child(ren) come to the door before they can be told to go back into the house, the first thing you say to them is, ''I love you and I have missed you.'' They simply come first and must know that your absence has not been their fault and that you have not wanted to stay away.

12. DO NOT ARGUE with you ex- regardless of how hurt or angry you are or what you ex- has to say. Staying calm and recording the conversation is the smartest thing to do and will get her/him in the long run and make you and your child(ren) the winners.

STATEMENT TO MAKE AT THE DOOR

''I am here to exercise my visitation. Going by our court order, I am to pick up (child's name) at this time. I have a copy of our divorce papers which says that this is my weekend with (child's name). I miss him/her very much and want to be with him/her, and I know how much he/she miss me.''

If told that they have other plans, say, ''I can take them where they are going, if you will just tell me when and where.''

If told that you cannot see because they are sick, ask, ''What is wrong with (child's name)? I will take his/her medicine with me and see that it is taken as ordered by the doctor.''

If you are still refused, say, ''I want to see (child's name), and tell him/her that I am sorry he/she is sick. Who is the doctor so I can talk to him/her and see how (child's name) is doing?''

If still refused, leave with the recorder running.

Also see: Incedent Reports-The Right Way