Before trial

  • Do: separate your finances (close joint accounts, cancel shared cards), keep a written record of key events and dates, try for a reasonable out-of-court settlement, and understand your attorney fees upfront.
  • Don’t: move out of the house unless a court orders it, badmouth your ex to your kids, or make major life changes (new car, moving in with someone) that could be used against you.

During trial

  • Do: attend every hearing, even ones your attorney says are optional, keep originals of every document, and push for specific, detailed visitation terms rather than vague language.
  • Don’t: sign anything you don’t fully understand, panic over a temporary ruling, or agree that support should be based solely on your income.

After trial

  • Do: follow your order consistently, even if your ex doesn’t, and give your kids room to adjust.
  • Don’t: relitigate the case with your children, or put your own life on hold.